The Story You Tell Changes Everything
A few weeks ago, I worked with the High Point University Women’s Lacrosse Team. (BTW - WHAT A BEAUTIFUL UNIVERSITY!!)
Back in September, I delivered a workshop with them that I’ve given in different forms hundreds of times.
It’s material I trust.
It landed with athletes, leaders, and teams over and over again.
So when the coach called me in November and said,
“We want you back. We want more. We want to go deeper,”
I felt two very real things at the same time.
Excitement.
And panic.
Excitement — because it meant the work mattered.
It resonated.
It made an impact.
And panic — because what she was asking for required something new.
This wasn’t a one-day workshop anymore.
It was two full days.
Six hours instead of three.
New exercises.
New activities.
New awareness moments.
Tools I’ve used extensively in my own life —
but hadn’t yet tested with a group like this.
And almost immediately, a familiar story took over.
They expect big things.
I can’t let them down.
What if I’ve already given them the best of what I know?
What if this doesn’t land?
What if I’m not enough this time?
The story sounded convincing.
It felt logical.
And the result?
I froze.
I’d sit at my laptop and stare at the screen.
No clarity.
No creativity.
No momentum.
Just a loop of doubt quietly draining my energy and confidence.
Sound familiar?
Same situation.
Same opportunity.
But the story I was telling myself changed everything.
After a few days of being stuck in that spiral, I finally stepped back and asked myself:
What story am I telling right now?
And even more importantly…
Is it true — or is it just familiar?
That’s when I shifted from assumption to curiosity.
From “This means something about me” to “This is data.”
Instead of assuming failure, I chose a new narrative:
“I won’t know what works unless I try.”
“These activities don’t have to be perfect — they have to be real.”
“One of my greatest strengths is connection and authenticity.”
“If I show up fully as myself, that is enough.”
I wrote out a two-day plan.
I was honest with the coach — many of these activities were new.
And she trusted me anyway.
That trust changed everything.
Clarity returned.
Curiosity replaced fear.
Creativity flowed again.
Each day, the workshop got better.
More refined.
More aligned.
And on January 9th and 10th, I delivered the two-day workshop — and had an absolute blast.
Not only were those athletes incredible to work with, they gave me permission to stretch, explore, and practice something new.
Same opportunity.
Same expectations.
Different story.
Completely different experience.
Here’s what I want you to reflect on:
Where in your life are you telling yourself a story that’s keeping you stuck?
What situation are you personalizing right now?
What assumptions are you making without evidence?
Where are you treating uncertainty as a verdict instead of information?
If you stepped back and observed the moment — what might you notice differently?
Because here’s what we often forget:
Everything is a story.
And the story you choose determines how you show up.
This Week’s Mindset Fuel
Dr. Ethan Kross — Chatter
📘 Mindset:
Mindset by Carol Dweck - (ONE OF MY FAVORITE BOOKS)
A powerful reminder that ability isn’t fixed — it’s shaped by the narratives we choose to believe and act upon.
🎧 Podcast:
Dr. Ethan Kross — Chatter
An incredible exploration of how stepping back from our inner dialogue can reduce anxiety and restore clarity.
Fear Means It’s Go Time: Action Step
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or scared this week — pause.
Ask yourself:
What story am I telling right now?
Name it.
Notice it.
Then take one small step to shift it.
For example:“I’ve never done this before” becomes“I’m learning what works — and that will make me better next time.”
Awareness creates choice.
And choice creates freedom.
You are never stuck with the story you’re telling.
You can write a new chapter — starting now.
Courage up,
-Missy
If you find yourself stuck in old stories my Crush the Inner Critic Online Course will help you build the internal tools to quiet the noise and change your story with confidence and certainty.
Also, starting in February, I will be coaching one-on-one clients who are ready to shift their narrative and finally take action. My goal is to support clients in developing clarity, confidence, resilience and personal ownership. So if the above message spoke to you and you are ready to engage fully in the process and want to grow personally, connect with Missy at Missy@themissywest.com to set up an inquiry call.
You’re reading this because you chose to download my resource guide or subscribe to my newsletter. I’m so glad you’re here. My hope is that with each read, you walk away with tools that help you show up with more courage each week. I know your time is valuable, so I truly appreciate you being here and taking a few minutes to read this note—one I’ll be sending your way every Tuesday.
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Business Address:
ORCA Leadership, LLC
PO Box 172116
Tampa FL 33672
