When Your Values Make the Decision
Over the years, I’ve learned something powerful about decision-making.
I don’t rely on motivation.
I don’t poll the room.
I don’t ask for others' opinions or what they might think.
And I don’t let fear be the loudest voice in the conversation.
I let my CORE VALUES decide.
When an opportunity shows up
a keynote request,
a workshop,
a new project,
a social event that pulls me away from my family
one-on-one or group coaching
I don’t immediately ask, “Can I make this work?”
I ask something much more grounding:
Does this align with who I am… and who I want to become?
Especially if it’s pulling me away from my family.
My top four core values are:
Growth.
Meaningful Work.
Authenticity.
Compassion.
And every meaningful decision gets filtered through them.
Growth
Will this stretch me in some way?
Will I learn something new, sharpen a skill, or step into discomfort that makes me better?
Will it demand courage not just comfort?
Because growth doesn’t just feel exciting.
Sometimes it scares you half to death.
Meaningful Work
Will this matter?
To me and to the people I’m showing up for?
Will there be impact — even if it’s quiet, even if it’s unseen?
Authenticity
Can I show up fully as myself?
No shrinking. No editing. No pretending to be someone I’m not.
No worrying about being accepted if I take up space as me.
Compassion
Does this offer kindness — to others and to myself?
And if my body or mind needs rest, can I choose to pause without guilt?
The last two took me a long time to learn.
Regarding authenticity, I spent a lot of my life hiding who I truly was so I formed habits for protection that made me show up pretending and sometimes being a character that I wasn’t. I never liked that version of myself but I didn’t know why..until now. I was simply out of alignment.
..and with compassion, I had to learn that compassion isn’t weakness or being soft. It’s simply showing kindness, love and empathy towards others. Truly being able to see multiple perspectives and being open to differences. But even more so, giving all these things to myself as well. That it’s okay to choose myself - to say “no” so I can rest and return to whole.
Here’s the unexpected gift of living this way:
When I use my core values as my decision-making tool,
my inner critic quiets almost immediately.
The second-guessing fades.
The uncertainty softens.
The fear loses its grip.
Because values bring clarity — and clarity brings courage.
And over time, staying aligned with my values has brought a deep, steady joy into my life.
Not the loud kind.
Not the performative kind.
The kind that comes from knowing I’m not trying to be who others want me to be —
I’m simply committed to becoming a better version of myself, one intentional decision at a time.
Here’s what I invite you to reflect on:
What are your top four core values for this year? (write them down)
Not based on who you are right now —
but based on who you want to be by the end of this year.
For example, growth might already be part of who you are —
but choosing it means doing things that stretch you beyond your current edge.
Values aren’t just words.
They’re directions.
Core values aren't what you believe. They are what you LIVE when it's uncomfortable, inconvenient, and unobserved. They become ACTIONS!
They are non-negotiable principles that guide how you show up, train, lead and respond to adversity.
This Week’s Mindset Fuel
📘Book:
Essentialism by
Greg McKeown
A powerful reminder that clarity isn’t about doing more — it’s about choosing what truly matters and letting everything else fall away.
🎧 Brené Brown
The Power of Vulnerability
A grounding reminder that authenticity isn’t risky — it’s freeing.
The Power of Vulnerability
James Clear - Core Values (Author of: Automic Habits)
This will give you a list of core values as a starting point. Your core values might not be on this list but it will hopefully get your mind moving in the right direction.
Fear Means It’s Go Time: Action Step
Write down your top four values for 2026.
Then take one upcoming decision — big or small — and ask:Which choice aligns most with the person I’m becoming based on your values?
Let that answer lead you to your next ACTION.
When you lead with values, fear loses its authority.
And if your inner critic has been loud lately,Crush the Inner Critic Course will help you build the internal tools to quiet the noise and make decisions with confidence and clarity.
Also, starting in February, I will be coaching one-on-one clients who are ready to shift their narrative and finally take action. My goal is to support clients in developing clarity, confidence, resilience and personal ownership. So if the above message spoke to you and you are ready to engage fully in the process and want to grow personally, connect with Missy at Missy@themissywest.com to set up an inquiry call.
Let me leave you with this:
You don’t need to have it all figured out.You just need a compass.
Your values can be that compass.
Courage up,
-Missy
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Business Address:
ORCA Leadership, LLC
PO Box 172116
Tampa FL 33672
