Accept the Darn Compliment

Written By Developer Designer

For years, I had a bad habit.   Whenever someone complimented me, I would immediately deflect it.

“You did such a great job.”
“Oh, thank you… but I could have done that part better.”
“That was such a powerful keynote.”
“Well, the audience was amazing.”
“Your business is growing so much.”
“I’ve just been lucky.”

I said “thank you,” but I would never just leave it at that. 

I would quickly redirect the credit. I would point to the team, the timing, the opportunity — anyone or anything but myself. And if I did acknowledge it, I followed it with what I should have done better.

Does this sound familiar? Shoot me an email at missy@themissywest.com and let me know your story.  Share with me the moment you kicked butt, received a compliment and then minimized ALL your work! I would love the opportunity to tell you straight up, “YOU EARNED IT!” 

Here is the thing… like you, I had worked relentlessly. I had invested in coaching. I had invested in courses. I had practiced. I had studied. I had failed and tried again. I had put in the hours no one saw.

And yet, when the results showed up, I struggled to own them. Somewhere along the way, I picked up the belief that being proud might sound cocky.  That saying, “Yes, I worked really hard for this,” might make people uncomfortable.

That confidence needed to be softened so I dimmed my light. 

Let me be straight with you:  STOP DOING THIS!  Keep your light shining! 

Why:   A) You EARNED  the recognition!  Just say “THANK YOU.”
B) Your inner critic loves when you shrink.

It loves when you minimize your effort.
It loves when you question your success.
It loves when you say, “It wasn’t that big of a deal.”

Women do this all the time. We downplay. We deflect. We redirect. We say, “I could’ve done better,” instead of allowing ourselves to stand in what we did well.

The moment you own your accomplishments, the critic loses power.

Owning your accomplishments is not arrogance.  It’s accuracy. It’s acknowledging the work you put in.  It’s allowing yourself to receive what you’ve earned.

It’s saying, “Yes. I did that.”

Why This Matters - Read This Multiple Times

If you cannot own your wins, you will never fully believe you’re capable of bigger ones.

The way you respond to success shapes how much of it you allow into your life.

When you diminish your accomplishments, your inner critic stays in charge. When you receive them fully, your inner coach grows stronger.

Fear Means It’s Go Time — Action Step

The next time someone compliments you, pause.

Don’t explain.
Don’t redirect.
Don’t minimize.

Just say, “Thank you.”

And let it land.

That discomfort you feel? That’s growth.  That’s you shifting out of your bad habit into a new more empowering habit.   One that accepts and embraces ALL of what you have worked so hard for.

Be proud of where you are and the work you put into getting there.

You are allowed to stand in it.

Courage up,
Missy

Looking for a one-on-one coach to help you crush your inner critic and start becoming the person you’ve always wanted to be?  I’m coaching clients who are ready to stop outsourcing their confidence and start taking ownership of their growth. If that’s you, schedule an inquiry call HERE.

If one-on-one coaching is not for you but you’ve noticed your inner critic getting louder, more anxious, or more convincing lately, my online course Crush the Inner Critic; Transforming Self-Talk For Professional Growth will help you build the internal tools to filter outside noise and trust yourself again.  

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